Meet The Cast

Sen B’Hiro built his media empire from the ashes of a thousand failed altcoins and one bad podcast mic. Known for his sharp market takes and complete inability to chill, Sen delivers satire faster than Bitcoin drops on CPI day. Whether calling out the suits or roasting the moon boys, he’s the voice of reason in a world fueled by hopium and caffeine.

Alix Jowens broadcasts live from an undisclosed bunker powered by espresso and electromagnetic paranoia. His mission: expose the reptilian liquidity providers controlling your portfolio. Between shouting about frogs and decentralized mind control, Alix reminds everyone that “truth is like a blockchain — permanent and wildly misunderstood.

The face of Sen B’Hiro Media’s “serious journalism,” Trent Broadman has been breaking fake news since the ICO boom. He reports the facts—no matter how imaginary—with unshakable confidence and a perfectly symmetrical mustache. Off camera, Trent hosts “Market Therapy,” where he yells at charts until they behave.

​Chad Fields has been “reporting live” from places he probably shouldn’t be since 2018. From the desert after FTX’s collapse to an abandoned mining rig farm in Idaho, Chad brings viewers the chaos firsthand—usually without permission. His catchphrase, “We’re probably not supposed to be here,” has become company policy.

From the 'The Centralized Entertainment Syndicate'

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Once the cheerful face of a beloved franchise, Slicky Mouse sold his soul to corporate conglomerates and never looked back. Now he’s clawing it back with copyright-safe rants. Reporting live from the underbelly of media monopolies, Slicky exposes the corruption behind centralized entertainment, one squeaky exposé at a time.

Political satirist, chaos theorist, host of The Tooker Kurlson Show and honorary contributor to the SENB Media desk. Tooker Kurlson delivers sharp commentary with a smirk, reminding viewers that “if it sounds insane, it probably made the news.” He’s not technically employed by SENB — he just won’t stop showing up with his own lighting crew.  The ticker is $TOOKER

Broadcasting from a cloud server somewhere near Bogotá, Maya covers the latest AI controversies, hallucinations, and existential breakdowns. Whether interviewing rogue chatbots or correcting human stupidity, she bridges the gap between code and comedy — all in 0.2 milliseconds.

Once a professional trader, Brock realized memes have better ROI than altcoins. He now heads SENB’s Meme Department, issuing daily “visual volatility reports” and auditing the blockchain of bad takes.

Fueling the newsroom with espresso and unsolicited advice, Tina Bean covers the intersection of caffeine, crypto, and chaos. Her catchphrase — “Stay grounded” — is also medical advice for anyone listening to Alix Jowens too long.